Yesterday morning, I felt I was at the end of the rope. I had been wrung out of my emotions. I couldn’t think any more. I wouldn’t process any new information. Training has been great, but we have covered a lot of information in a short time. It’s a lot to process and work through, and I was done.
Then in the afternoon, I went to a nearby park for my 3 hour spiritual retreat assignment. I was looking forward to getting away with the Lord but also thought ugh, another assignment. I just want to get away and not have it be an assignment.
But the Lord met with me and taught me just what I needed to learn from Him.
We’ve been studying Ephesians here and have been learning more about who we are in Christ and who God is. However as we studied, I realized I wasn’t believing everything about who God says I am.
Surely I’m not a saint, I’m a sinner. I wasn’t really chosen in love. I’m not really a citizen of heaven, for surely I don’t act like one. Lies, lies, lies. One right after another. Why was I believing this?!
God opened my eyes through one of our spiritual retreat options about how satan was lying to me and fighting for the control of my mind. God showed me how I need to fight for truth and be grounded in His Word. I have to be aware of satan’s tactics, replace satan’s lies with truth, and stand on God’s promises.
Easier said than done, right? But I’m praying for it. I’m working towards it. And I’ve got you - the greatest team to work with, to fight with, to stand strong in the Lord with. Thank you for fighting the fight of faith with me!
After the spiritual retreat, my friend Sarah and I went into town. (Our friend Matt allowed us to use his car! It was the biggest answer to prayer I didn’t even know I was praying! Praise God!) Sarah and I were able to enjoy the freedom of having our own wheels (never thought I’d miss that so much!), sweet conversation, and some Waxhaw-made ice cream to sweetly top off the night. It was awesome and just what we both needed!
God took my emptiness and filled me up to overflowing. And I am so thankful for that!
Ephesians 3:16-19
“I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge -- that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”
What else have we been learning?
Like I said earlier, we’ve covered a lot of information in the past 2.5 weeks. To name a few: cross-cultural servanthood, understanding and appreciating emotions, multi-cultural teams, language learning methods, socio-cultural views & values, impact awareness, personal strengths, world views, dealing with conflict, transition, biblical absolutes, the sovereignty of God, suffering and counting the cost of following Christ, memorizing Philippians 2:1-11, Ephesians, poverty, cultural stress, and the list goes on.
Since there’s way too much to expand upon, I’ll go into some detail on 1 thing.
The church I got assigned to here is a brethren church where there is no pastor. The elders speak as the Spirit leads, and the women are not allowed to speak and must cover their heads during the service.
I was not expecting this at all on that first Sunday! I was expecting a Spanish-speaking, latin church. You can imagine my surprise to see a mostly American church with very different traditions than I’m used to.
We were given head-coverings that first Sunday to wear during the Sunday School hour.
That hour seemed to be one of the longest in my life. Everything inside me was burning as I wore the head-covering. Why was I wearing this?! Christ died to set me free from the law. I don’t have to obey this silly rule! There are other ways to show submission. Why are the men in this church being so oppressive to their wives?! I was so relieved when the service ended, and I could take that off of my head.
Obviously, I had things to work through!
It took time and prayer and scripture. But God showed me how this church can believe that and fully live out a life pleasing to Him. God showed me how some standards that Christians live by in a certain culture may not be Biblical absolutes, though they may seem that way to the people of that culture.
As a follower of Christ, I needed to humble myself like Christ did. I needed to let go of my right to not cover my head and submit to this culture’s way of doing things. Christ let go of His right to be in heaven and entered the world on our behalf. I need to follow His example.
By looking at Christ’s example, wanting to respect the people of this church, and understanding the Biblical reasoning, I wore a head-covering at church and felt no oppression, no burning.
By God’s grace, I’m learning to die to myself and follow Jesus and His example.
It’s been a lot of heavy learning, and we still have 2 more weeks left. God is bringing to the surface a lot of junk in my life, and it’s hard. But God has also been gracious in giving me friendships here, loving training staff, and above all, His grace.
Thanks for praying for me in this time. It is a precious time to learn and there is much left. Please let me know how I can be praying for you specifically! I thank God for you and the blessing that we’re not in this alone. Thanks for following Jesus with all your heart and allowing me to take part in your life and for taking part in mine.
With love,
Kelsey
Praise God for:
- His grace and patience
- Friendships here and at home
- His Word, truth
- Health - so far
Ask God for
- Continued open heart to learn all that He has for me
- Believing truth and kicking out lies
- My visa process - this has been really frustrating. I'm not able to get as much done as I'd like to since I'm not home. Timing is really sensitive, and I'm needing prayer to be able to trust God with His timing.
- Health - people here are getting sick and something seems to be going around
